Just sharing about what happened today:
My patient was sick, has stage 4 lung Cancer and was breathing via 100% nonrebreather mask. He has chest tube at right side as well. (In layman's term- he's really sick.)
Like what I usually do, I talk to my patients cuz i want to develop a more personal yet professional relationship with them, to make them feel that they are not another workload in my eyes but a person just like myself to be treated with respect the way I treat myself. That's how I see everyone- equal, maybe not all the time but mostly.
He was sick and I was already concerned with him although I don't personally know him. I had conversation with him:
Me: so, do you have any kids?
P: yeah..
Me: Cool. Are they coming to visit you?
P: No. I don't think so.
Me: How old are they?
P: 9 and 13.
Me: oh wow.
Cancer is no joke so I thought it would be very bad if he would pass away and leave his family like that. Now I began to feel really more concerned. He was sick and here I am, confessing stuffs like "THERE IS NOTHING IMPOSSIBLE WITH GOD."
I know I can do more than giving meds and doing my nursing stuff. I claim to believe in a literally impossible God in an ordinary man's perspective. I do know that God is able to heal him. I have no doubt. So I thought of praying for him. I was reluctant because I normally don't do that. I usually say, "ill be praying for you." Go home, sleep then completely forget. I was tempted to do that but I was moved out of love. It is a sin for me not to do what is right if I knew what was right.
Being aware of how Americans are when it comes to God, I closed the curtain and gathered my courage and asked him,
Me:I normally don't do this but do you want me to pray for your healing?
Patient: sure, if that helps.
Me: ok let's do it now.
Patient: nevermind. (Shook his head and put his oxygen back on)
Me: ok. (A little frustrated)
So I opened the curtain and asked, "just wondering, why did you not want it?" He said because he is not religious. I said "you don't really have to be religious to pray" in a little frustrated voice. (To believe in God is not to be religious if you can relate) "I'm not making you believe what I believe. It's just like I'm offering you your med. You know.."
If only he have prayed with me, beyond a shadow of doubt, he would be healed, DEFINITELY not necessarily immediately. I was so confident that he will be healed that if it did not happen, the very first thing I would do when I get to Heaven is tell God that He lied about it. I just know. I just have full confidence that he would be healed. The diagnosis or word from the doctors would have been easily overriden by the Word of God saying "I can heal Him and I am willing." He created us and able to do all things.
He did not have to believe in it. My faith alone would have been more than enough to be honored by God. If we prayed, he would have been healed and his case would have made it to the "miracles or unexplainable wonders in medicine" stuff. My intention was good and selfless (by God's grace). I wasn't even gonna tell him to believe what I believe. I just want him healed because I'm concerned and I love him.
But he refused.
Because he is not religious.
Now I understand and respect that. The Bible nowhere says to force my belief in other people. I present God as who He is and it is up to people to believe or not. Praise God if you believe, if not praise God for His patience and mercy. Whatever the situation is I praise God.
I am just concerned that by saying "I am religious and I have a different spirituality. I just don't wanna talk about it.", I'm afraid that we are making a god out of our own idea just because it is convenient for us. We don't wanna talk about it because we will immediately find out how weak our belief is and that is inconvenient. We normally don't want inconvenience. Not in this pampered country especially.
The 1st commandment is not to have other gods before Him. God reveals Himself. He does not want us to guess what He is like. That's why we have the Bible. I personally don't want to form an idea of who you are. I could be wrong. I would be most likely wrong. I have to talk to talk to you and know you personally. Same with God. We need to know Him personally and we can.
Now there is an increasing persecution of Christians here in USA and I praise God for that. I believe that persecution is the missing ingredient of church growth.
I'm hearing that a Christian would get in trouble for sharing the gospel which is the message of God's love reaching out to us by forgiving our sins. To reject the gospel or Jesus is to reject God's love.
Don't be surprised then my friends if I ever go to prison for my faith. It is my Master's promise that the world will hate me for His name's sake. I am not afraid.
I fear God and not man. I am not of this world. When I die, I'm going Home. To be alive and share Christ or to die and be with Him- either way I am in a win-win situation. Praise God.
